Empty Office. Full Heart.

A 12-year relationship changed on a Friday afternoon in May. I resigned my position at Fusion Alliance as the VP of Digital Solutions and Marketing to start my own firm. It was a good 12 years and looking back I wished I had written more about it, but I didn't. So, here are a few gems that rattled around in my head as I was leaving the office on that Friday afternoon with the last car-full of books, gadgets and memories:

(1) Be courageous. As I was taking down my "found object" cork board in my office, I found a magnet that said "Do the thing you think you cannot do." Do it, because you can do it. Believe in yourself, do an appropriate level of planning (you'd have to ask my husband how much is "appropriate" because we have two very different scales) and then push forward. In the past several weeks since pushing forward, I've had beautiful conversations, received sweet encouragement, met new people and found some healthier rhythms. And the best part...being courageous isn't something I can check off my to-do list. It's something I get to keep doing every day.

(2) Be open. While I certainly have a vision and aspirations for my new company, the co-creation of the story up to this point has been quite a trip. It's true that two heads are better than one and I would offer that, at times, 10 are better than two. It has taken me a measure of humility to admit that I'm not 100% sure where I'm headed and that I need help. But what has come of telling people my story, being open to their input and accepting their offers to help has opened my mind up to a world of possibilities that I'm certain I wouldn't have found on my own. And you can ask my executive coach, but it takes a good 2 to 3 years for some ideas to sink into my head so I'm grateful that so many people are in this with me for the long haul.

(3) Be awesome. I have several good friends who are awesome. And they help other people (like me) be awesome too. The coolest part about striving to be awesome is that it attracts awesome - people who inspire and want you to be inspired, people who have deep passions and want you to be passionate, people who see things in a whole new light and want you to see things differently too. So I'll continue to strive for awesomeness and know that on the days that I'm barely able to be present that the other awesome people in the world will hold it together for all of us (and I'll do the same for them).

There are so many things, people and experiences to be grateful for over the last 12 years. And while I left an empty office, I have a full heart. What a blessing to have so many courageous, open and awesome people cheering me on! Thanks for everything!

A Parable of Bert the Bat

It was on a beautiful Saturday afternoon that I met Bert as I was putting away garden tools. Much to my surprise (and fear), I saw him hanging next to the wooden workbench in our garage. Our garage! A bat! IN OUR GARAGE!

I'm generally a "live and let live" kind of person when it comes to creepy, crawly, furry, funny creatures. But I was not completely comfortable with a bat hanging in my garage. But I was less comfortable with the thought of poking the little guy and having him flap his bat-wings in my face on the way out of the garage. So I left him alone.

Facebook feedback from knowledgeable bat-lovers let me know that Bert may be endangered and that I shouldn't move him. That he was hibernating but would leave when he wakes up. And that when he woke up, he and his bat-friends would help keep the insect population down.

But after weeks of watching Bert hang in his stoic sleep I began to wonder if his sleep was, actually, lifeless. So, I sent one of my aforementioned bat-loving friends into the garage to investigate. The sad report was that Bert was dead. And had been for some time.

As I was plucking Bert off the wall with my long handled bat-remover (also known as a trash picker) the following Saturday, it struck me as funny. Not that Bert was dead, but what an interesting range of emotions I experienced over what was ultimately a dead animal. I feared him. I worked to get over that fear. I spent time checking on him. I worried about him so much that I had to get a friend involved to assess his health. And it got me thinking...what things occupy the garages of my life that I waste  energy and emotion on? And how many of those things are already dead and should just be plucked off the wall and left in the woods outside my life?

My 3 Words - 2013 Edition

This is my third year in the "3 Words" world. Chris Brogan talks a lot about selecting three words with which to theme the year. Instead of a list of resolutions that will surely be broken by January 15, finding three words or themes for the year provide a fluidity to life with a some basis for grounded decision making.

I selected three words for the first time in 2011 - connect, share, ship. These words impacted my behavior and resulted in some fascinating experiences that I may take the time to blog about some day. In 2012, my words were breathe, flow, move. And 2012 turned out to be a wonderful year to let go a bit more, pick my battles more carefully and spend more time filling my heart with ideas.

And so, I thougtht I would be addressing 2013 with fresh confidence and vigor. Instead, I struggled with my three words. The first one, Courage, came very easily. The second word was forced and subsquently thrown out, but not before my husband gave me my third word - Decisive. Not shortly after being called to be more decisive, did I change my second word to Improv. See why:

Courage - My 2012 Steve Jobs wall calendar exclaimed to me,"Have the courage to follow your heart and your intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become." So in 2013 I will have the courage to take steps I need to take - over, around or through the roadblocks I or others may put in my way.

Improv - Not 'improve' although I hope to always be doing that. Improv as in Improvisational Theater where most of the action is created at the moment it is performed, with little or no pre-planning. For me, the key is being in the moment and building upon it. It's about 'Yes and' instead of 'No because'. This will be quite a stretch for me.

Decisive - My husband very quickly came to my aid with this word when I told him I was struggling. And I struggled with taking on someone else's interpretation of my words, even though my husband knows me better than anyone else. So in the car one dark morning on the way to work, I embraced this word and it is the one I believe will challenge me the most. I want to continue to see the possibilities and arrange the pieces, but most of all I want to make concrete decisions, lead boldly and from a place of honesty.

I would love to hear your three words if you have them. And would certainly welcome you inquiring about mine throughout the year.