Mall Walking. The Next Front Porch.

Back in the day, families use to sit out on their front porches to stay cool during the long, lazy summer months. Fans fanning and lemonade being drunk, families were pretty much forced into community with each other, their neighbors and passers-by. And then the invention of air conditioning changed our world forever.

Beyond obvious things like being able to sleep without needing to relocate to the crawl space, the air conditioner actually changed how we interact. No longer was it necessary to sit on the porch, so no longer was it a reality to spend large amounts of time with family and friends. Think about it. If you sat outside on your front stoop, how many people would stop and sit for a spell?

Eyeballs & Jawbreakers

I went with my husband to his eye appointment on Saturday. His provider happens to be located in our local mall. His appointment, however, started before the stores in the mall were open and we were early enough that his doctor wasn't even open. I can honestly say that I've not been in the mall when it's closed but what a fascinating experience.

As we sat on a little bench outside the doctor's office, I spied a giant carnival of candy dispensers. Something they hide down the side corridors to get one last quarter out of parents on their way out, I suspect. Then, I noticed wedged between the Lemonheads and Giant Jawbreakers was a Grande Starbucks something-er-other. After wishing I had a Starbucks, I thought, "What slob left their trash there?" I got my answer 3 minutes later when a collection of mall walkers glided by and one yoga-pant-clad women peeled away from the group to take a swig of her coffee. I was mortified and impressed all at the same time.

And then more walkers went by. Couples. Groups of men. Groups of women. But they all had one thing in common (other than their amazing ability to get up early on a Saturday to exercise), they were in animated conversations with each other. Community was happening right before my very eyes. One lap at a time. They looked like seasoned veterans and I was left thinking how spectacular it was that these people had inverted the air conditioning conundrum. They had come in from the cold and created community. And it made me think there was hope for us yet. If this handful of people can find a new front porch in the mall, I bet we all can find new front porches! Where's yours?

Starbucks Moment #164

If you're wondering where the first 163 Starbucks moments are recorded, you'll have to invite me to coffee. Actually, I haven't written them all down, but as I've been a gold club member since 2008 I figure I've had at least that many moments and probably more like 1633.

I was happily working at my seventeenth office (the Starbucks on Monument Circle). And as is bound to happen, a man in Colt's gear sat at the bar beside me. Well, it IS play-off weekend.

As I packed up my stuff to go, he asked if I was a writer.

A funny question, I thought.

I said, "No, why do you ask?"

Thinking he would comment on my typing speed or the book sitting next to me. His response surprised me.

He said, "Oh, I don't know. You just seem kind of, well, content. Happy."

I was taken aback. "Really?" I must have looked very perplexed, so he reframed his comment by saying, "Just the way you were working, your movements and thoughtfulness. You seem content." I smiled,  thanked him for the kind words and said that I was quite happy.

As I walked out of the Starbucks I had two distinct responses.

First, a big thank you to God for putting that man in my path today. I've spent the better part of a couple of months wondering if I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing, professionally speaking. Am I equipped? Was all the soul searching over the past few years a lie? And my personal favorite...what are people going to think if I decide I'm not really doing what I'm supposed to be doing? In my heart I know I'm where I'm supposed to be. But north of there, I have had constant doubts swirling. The words that man spoke wholly confirmed for my head what my heart seems to already know.

Second, a sense of tingling curiosity. Why was I giving off an aura of contentment and energy? As I unpacked that on my drive home, I came up with this:

• Contribution - I spent the previous evening adding analytics code to a client's website and watching the results come in. I am excited to be helping one of my current clients achieve their goals.
• Education - I had just come from a 3-hour kick off meeting with a new client. I got a chance to learn about their company, their products, their team and their vision for the future. I was totally jazzed to be included and trusted.
• Collaboration - I was on my way to meet a creative team with whom I'm going to be working. The anticipation of experiencing a new environment, building relationships and creating something together made me giddy.

I have a lot more unpacking to do as the baggage I have clearly isn't carry-on size. But, thanks Mr. Starbucks! My investment is really seeing returns!

My 3 Words - 2014 Edition

This is my fourth year in the "3 Words" world. Chris Brogan talks a lot about selecting three words with which to theme the year. Instead of a list of resolutions that will surely be broken by January 15, finding three words or themes for the year provide a fluidity to life with a some basis for grounded decision making.

I selected three words for the first time in 2011 - connect, share, ship. 

In 2012, my words were breathe, flow, move. 

I struggled with my three words in 2013, but in the end courage, improv and decisive led to some amazing, life changing things. To sum up 2013, I mustered up the courage to leave my job to start my own company - a decision my husband will tell you I've wrestled with for years. And one of the highlights of my personal growth was a series of improv classes. Man, is it hard to say, "yes and," to be exactly in the moment, listen well and respond to the action directly in front of you. Good lessons for life, not just for improv class.

Fractal with recursive drawing. www.matthewjamestaylor.com

Because I so warmly embraced my husband's addition of decisive to my word list for 2013 (read with a hint of sarcasm), I thought for 2014 I would reach out to my Facebook community and see what words they might offer me. I got some great suggestions and after much thought, here are my words for 2014:

Create : I have a studio full of art supplies and at times an endless supply of ideas. But I also have an irrational fear of starting new projects especially if they don't come to me as assignments. So, this year is the year I will create just to create - and I won't judge myself on the time spent, the nobility of purpose or the outcome.

Temple - In 1 Corinthians 6, Paul asks: 

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?  You are not your own; you were bought at a price.  Therefore honor God with your body."

If I really believed that my physical body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, would I make different choices about what I put into it and how I use it? And so, this year I will learn more about this "body as a temple" directive and see where it leads me.

Edit - At first, it seemed a bit counterintuitive for both 'create' and 'edit' to have a place on the list. But I am feeling deeply called to both. Sometimes I can't create because I haven't edited the unnecessary, the clutter, the extraneous thoughts that stop the creative process. I'm excited to see where this paradox takes me in 2014. After all, the Master prunes back even the branches that bear fruit so that they may bear even more fruit.

Here's to a fruitful 2014! Love to hear what your words are for the year!